Last Friday Night (T.G.I.F.)

Right now I have about a dozen teenagers in my backyard.

Only one of them belongs to me...the rest just think they do.

One of them brought firecrackers...

yes, firecrackers.

I think that is against the law.

Not having them...just shooting them off. Which is what they are doing.

I have told them that if I hear one more go off I will banish them from my property.

Seriously...

So since I am up and making sure that none of them help themselves to my wine or Stoli vodka I thought I would blog about...nothing...but whatever...I'm blogging.

So I will tell you about my weekend. The teenagers being here is a fitting end to it...

Because it was a very good weekend...minus the dozen teenagers and the firecrackers.

So Friday was the first of a two-part celebration of my sister-wife GOTTESS' birthday. We call each other sister-wife because we share GOTT...she's married to him but I'm the "work wife" so there ya go.

So GOTTESS is celebrating the anniversary of her 25th birthday. I won't tell you what anniversary but in any case it is a very fun number and she looks at least 10 years younger than her driver's license shows. GOTTESS is HOT!

So she decides that we need a rock star weekend. So she buys tickets to the Katy Perry concert for her and 5 friends.

And she rents us the Rock Star Suite at the Hotel ZaZa.

OMG

OMG

OMG

We lived and partied like rock stars.

I picked her up to go to the hotel. We both were toting food and wine.

She had been informed by the hotel that outside food and beverages were not welcome at the hotel.

The suite has a full kitchen...

So Lucy has some 'splainin to do as to why there is a kitchen (with a Sub Zero fridge/freezer, cooktop, dishwasher and oven) but no food...

We decided to take our chances and brought in our own snackage.

So we get to the hotel and go up to the suite...OMG...

Here are a few more photos...they don't do it justice...

Suffice it to say that I don't think Elton John would complain.

It was awesome...study, living room, dining room, kitchen (use that useless set of appliances that you can't use), 2 bedrooms and 2 1/2 baths.

And a view of downtown that was breathtaking.

And a whole lotta chandeliers....

We squealed like 12 year old girls who had just gotten on an elevator with Justin Bieber...

First order of business...put up the food and put on our suits so we can head to the pool.

SuSu (one of GOTTESS' besties) joined us and we headed down to the pool for some adult beverages and some sun.

(We interrupt this blog for a brief special report...for the last 2 minutes Ke$ha Barbie's car alarm has gone off and any second now I expect the police at my door...between that and firecrackers I'm sure my neighbors hate me...I'm banishing the teenagers).

So back to GOTTESS' celebration...

GOTT joins us...he is our chauffeur for the night...I think we confused every other guest at the pool because we all kept calling him our husband. Our own little version of "Big Love"...

After a few tasty mojitos (I recommend the "blue" version with blackberries and blueberries muddled with the mint) we went upstairs and ate and did the best version of a rush job "let's look hot" that we could...

Here is a photo of me...not very good...sadly does not show the fabulous sparkly shoes I wore (that really killed my feet) or my crazy blue nail polish...I haven't asked the other girls if it is ok to post their photos so you just get me...it was windy...my hair was "meh"...dress rocked tho....

So the world's handsomest and best chauffeur (GOTT) drove us to the concert and was very very very happy he wasn't going with us.

We grabbed a drink and headed to our seats to catch the opening act...

which was...

terrible

I think one of the girls described the girl (her name was Robyn...I pray she isn't your dear friend...please know I'm sure she is very nice but she was not worthy of Katy Perry) as sounding like a cat screaming...or in heat...or both...

or maybe that is just my description...

I tried to block it...suffice it to say I will not be downloading any of her songs.

Thankfully I had enough "adult beverages" in me that I survived it...but just barely.

Finally Katy hit the stage and she totally rocked. She was great.

She was very cute and entertaining and her entire stage looked like a "Candyland" gameboard.

She made about 15 costume changes during one song (Hot & Cold)...I still don't know how she did the last one---glitter cannons went off in front of her and suddenly she was in a new dress.

AS a costume person this totally intrigued me...

So the show was great and once it was over...well, when you have 6 women who have just spent 2 hours looking at a stage full of candy we only had one thing on our minds...

The CRAVE CUPCAKES that were waiting at the suite.

So GOTT shows up to whisk us back to the suite and the cupcakes did a disappearing act.

We were joined there by a few more friends and we stayed up late playing some games and having a grand time.

At 1:30 I decided that I wanted to sleep in my own bed so since I had stopped drinking and was sober and not too tired I drove home and enjoyed my Temperpedic mattress and slept well.

Saturday I ran some errands...

And then I had my little adventure with the pool boys.

If you read my Facebook Status you know what happened...but for those of you in blogland I will repeat:

So topless sunbathing is NOT a good idea. I was laying out, getting my tan nice and even and took off my top. No one was home and no one was coming home. The pool people come on Thurday (so I thought) and it is usually a woman (so I thought) so I thought I was safe.

WRONG

WRONG

WRONG

I had my headphones in and the music was a bit loud. I closed my eyes to enjoy the sun and somewhere between a Manchester Orchestra and Joss Stone song I open my eyes to discover I am not alone.

Yes, the pool boys had arrived.

And they were boys....or at least closer to Ke$ha Barbie's age than mine.

I calmly put my top back on and tried not to die of utter mortification.

I hope they enjoyed the show.

It would have been a better show had I already let Dr. Bonnie Baldwin work her magic so instead they got...well, they got what they got...

So to get over that little lesson in humiliation I decided I better do something to improve my mood so I went and had a great time having a pedicure in the company of AngelAmy and we cooked us a fine dinner on the grill and had a grand time.

Today I got up and went to JayVee's spin and express weights class and was joined by Trainer Girl.

After lunch with JayVee we (me and Trainer Girl) hit the pool and then cooked us up some shrimp on the barbie and settled in to enjoy our show---True Blood. Great show tonight except that we did not have enough shirtless men...if you haven't watched that show it is totally worth getting HBO just to see the men.

And so now I have teenagers making too much noise in my backyard and I'm just trying to not go crazy.

I've got to get up tomorrow and face Dimples and tell him the damage I did...

Oh, and one more thing...

On Saturday I bought a gun...

but that's a whole other story...and blog...

Inspiration Song....well what else could it be? I saw the Katy Perry concert on Friday night so it HAD to be "Last Friday Night (T.G.I.F.)...great song, great show, she's a great little entertainer...

Bye Darlings...party like a rock star any time you can...but don't sunbathe topless unless you are sure the pool boys aren't going to show up...

You Spin Me Round

Spinning...that's me...

Not just on a spin bike...

seems like I was spinning my wheels a bit last week...both literally and figuratively...driving all over town for costume stuff and then having some personal issues where one thing would get planned and then cancelled and I had to reorganize my days around that...

like completely buying all the groceries to make a certain meal only to have the meal cancelled as I walked out of the grocery store with all the groceries purchased...not my friend's fault (the rescheduling) but that is how my timing seemed to be all week and weekend. But I"m cooking that meal tomorrow so no damage is done and all my ingredients are still good...

or here's another example...I spent 2 hours yesterday learning a dance to do in a flash mob only to come hone to discover the day of the flash mob is when I need to pick up The Cutest Boy in the World from camp...at least I had a fun workout with GOTTESS and GOTT...

or heading out on I-10 to go and fetch a friend from the airport and then my poor friend texted me her plane was delayed...at least I wasn't down the road far at all...so I headed to sonic and got me a Route 44 Diet Dr. Pepper with Vanilla (easy ice)...

But today...today I did something on the spin bike I have never done.

I sorta, well basically I taught a spin class.

You see what happened was...

There was no spin class scheduled today at the club. JayVee cancelled it because we have notoriously low attendance on holidays and special days like Father's Day.

Today was Father's day...so no class.

Knowing that, I invited Trainer Girl to join me at the club and we would make our own spin class. I knew the room would be empty and so I brought my boom box and made a play list.

Trainer Girl and I climb onto the bikes and we start rolling...we get through our warmup and we are about 15 minutes in when a friend pops his head in and remarks that we are really early for class...

I inform him that there is no class...

he was not exactly happy...

and then said his wife and daughter were coming too...

I invited him and his family to join us...but warned him that my playlist might now be his favorite (he hates Britney and I had some Brit on there).

So next thing I know he and the fam are pulling in bikes...so the guy that is working and in charge of the desk at the club comes in and turns on the BIG stereo for us...

So I ask them:

"Do you want me to guide us? Teach?"

I got an "Amen" from the choir...so I pulled my bike up front so I wouldn't have to yell and we started rolling along...

Another friend joined us...and then some lady I didn't know came in.

I taught a class to 6 people...

And here is the miracle...

they seemed to like it...a lot...

They liked my crazy music...they liked what I had them do...and my friend even put up with the Britney because his daughter, wife and I told him to.

I did pretty good...in an hour I burned 566 calories....that is about 100 more than usual...I guess it was the adrenaline and knowing I had to keep going because they were watching me.

So as I was pedaling along I had a brief thought that it was kind of a miracle that I could do it at all. 15 months ago I would not have dreamed I would take a spin class much less have the balls (sorry, sometimes I need to be crude) to teach a class.

I'm no expert...far from it...but I think it might be something I could do.

I'm pretty good with the music...I have a good ear for what will work...that being said I did put one song on the playlist that was a "fail" and I stopped it 1/3 of the way in...

I've taken enough spin to know how to work to the music and what works to get your heart rate up.

So tomorrow I am going to go and talk to JayVee about what it would take for me to be a spin teacher...maybe she will let me teach with her for a while to get the hang of it but I think I did a decent job today.

I'm sort of scared to do it...and for about 5 minutes today I was scared to lead a class...but sometimes doing something that scares you a little is good for you.

Who knows...maybe I will become Spinderella 2...

Inspiration Song: "You Spin Me Round" by Dead or Alive...great little 80's song...but I recently saw the lead singer on a show about bad plastic surgery and he scared the bejeezus out of me...and scared me off of having any work done to my face...

Bye Darlings...don't spin your wheels...try something that scares you a little...

Head Games

Sometimes I think the only real obstacle to losing this weight (other than my screwed up knee) is my head...

Because, as I have said before, I let myself get in my own way.

It's a head game, this weight loss...

First, you have to get it in your head that you WANT to do it...and this is for anything...weight loss, fitness, getting rid of bad habits, training to do something like a triathalon, etc.

Then you have to get it in your head you CAN do it. You can't let yourself stand in your own way.

I know I blog endlessly about how much I love my trainer Dimples and my "J-girls" (instructors at my health club) but I cannot say enough about how much it helps me when they motivate me.

Dimples is always telling me that I CAN do something...or I CAN do a few more...or to at least try something. But so often just when I am about to get in my own way with something, he says the RIGHT something to me to keep me going.

And now he sends "tweets" (yes, I finally am learning about Twitter thanks to my Dimples). It's a good way for him to keep in touch of his bootcamp clients but also to send motivating and positive messages to his clients and followers.

Messages like this (remember twitter limits you to 140 characters so you have to use shorthand):

U must believe absolutely that u're not only capable of achieving your desired goal, but also that it's only a matter of time before you do

I'm keeping that on my phone...to look at when I need it...because I often need it.

You can follow him on twitter too if you want...just sign up for:
@jessetraining

So today I did a 90 minute spin class AFTER I did the new launch of Body Pump 76.

I was a bit intimidated about it...until I realized that last Friday after the one icicle shut down Houston that I gave myself a spin class that lasted over 90 minutes.

But I almost let my head stand in my way...I almost told myself I couldn't do it.

Thankfully my knee did NOT tell me I couldn't do it!

It was 2:35 minutes of exercise...

I got through it...piece of cake...which helped me resist the piece of cake that I really really really wanted to eat at GOTTPARENTS 50TH Anniversary party (woo-hoo...50 years of wedded bliss to an amazing couple with amazing kids and grandkids...love love love them...).

I wanted that cake. It looked good. My stomach said "yes, yes, yes" but thankfully this time the game going on in my head was a good one and my head said "no no no". And I told GOTTESS to keep me away from it.

GOTTSISTERS didn't recognize me...they haven't seen me since last spring...one of them said "you looked familiar but I didn't think it was you"...

love that...
love her for saying it...

For some people that would feel awful, but to my thinking, it is great. I'm happy that I look different.

So I was watching Oprah the other day (duh...when do I NOT watch Oprah?)and she had Jennifer Hudson on.

Jennifer Hudson has gone from a size 16 to a 6. She's lost 85 pounds. She looks amazing.

I've lost more weight but I've had (and still have) more to lose.

She's always been beautiful.

As I looked at her I tried to be honest with myself and see if I thought she was really more beautiful because she is thinner...or am I just trained to think so because that is what is accepted as pretty---thin.

I decided that to my eyes, and my head, she is NOT MORE beautiful...she just looks good...and healthy...and happy.

She talked about how it really plays with your head when you lose the weight. How she walks into stores and picks up things that are the wrong size because they are TOO BIG for her.

Now that is a head game I also play...

When I walked into Victoria's Secret for the first time in 8+ years a few weeks ago I had to talk myself into it the whole way through the mall. And I was afraid I was going to go in there and be told that nothing would fit so I should try Lane Bryant. And I was afraid that I was going to find that I looked like a fool.

But I didn't...and I have a drawer full of new undergarments to prove it.

I was at my favorite store "Lucy" a few weeks ago...I grabbed some pants in in XL and the girl helping me said "no, you need a large...that will be too big".

When I went into the dressing room and the pants fit, I cried.

In my head, I am still a plus-sized girl.

But my body is not...

It's a head game...and I could totally relate to what Jennifer was saying to Oprah about it.

She (Jennifer) also said that she loves trying on new clothes and wearing her new clothes. I can relate to that too...I can't believe I actually fantasize about some of my skirts...that I can actually wear them. I started going through my clothes the other day and realized that I better TRY things on because my brain was saying "no way" but the zipper would go up and my body would say "way...".

Today, after the LONG workout, I met my Aunt Jane (the BEST PERSON IN THE WOLRD) and her friend CAT (Cute and Tiny) for lunch. They had a gift for me.

Jane had taken the photos she took of us (and me) on top of the hill I climbed at our camp reunion. You know...the 218 steps...

For those of you who did not read that blog ("Climb Every Mountain"), I'll give you the 10 second explanation:
When I once couldn't catch my breath after going up 24 steps with a teacher friend I realized that I needed to change my life. So I did. So 6 months later when I climbed 218 steps and didn't DIE, it felt like a big big big deal.

When we got to the top of the hill we prayed and took photos. So Jane gave me the photos today in a frame. To remind me of what I have and will still accomplish.

I cried with joy from the love and beauty of the gift.

Like I said, she is the best person in the world...

and that might be one of the most amazing gifts I have ever received...

And I'm putting it on my nightstand...not because I look good in the photos (in fact, I look awful...no make-up and still around 230 pounds), but rather to remind me what I have done and what I can do.

It's like the tweets I get from Dimples...little reminders to my brain that I can do what I have set out to do.

Now one game I play in my head that will probably only ever be in my head and not reality is a fantasy...and that is ok...fantasies are good! They help move us forward. You all know mine:
Oprah invites me to be on her show to tell how I have lost weight and blogged about it and she gives me a Vera Wang gown to wear because I once met Vera and told her I wanted to wear one of her gowns when I lose weight...

That little fantasy is a head game that is all for fun...but it helps motivate me too...

because...

I don't want to stand in my own way:
to finish an exercise in training
to do a long spin class
to try something new with Dimples
to try on new clothes in a smaller size
to walk into a store that intimidates me
to put on something I haven't worn in 9 years
to dress to show off my hard work
to wear my mom's Vera Wang dress and rock it

Because the only thing stopping me is in my head...not my body...

It's all head games...and I am pretty good at those kinds of games (physical games...notsomuch)...

in fact, I usually win...

I think I'm gonna win this one...like my Dimples says: "it's just a matter of time"...

Inspiration Song: JayVee served up Foreigner's "Head Games" today in the 90 minute master class for spin...it was the perfect song at the 80 minute mark...she's so amazing...

Bye Darlings...win your head game...

Stupid Girl

Sometimes I can be such a stupid girl.

I haven't blogged in a few days...

we had a blizzard here in Houston, you know?

No...not really...we had, like I predicted "one icicle"...

ok, it was more than ONE icicle but the snow didn't happen...

sigh...

I was looking forward to a little snow...but just a little.

It was about 27 degrees out on Thursday so Dimples and I planned an indoor workout. We did our best to keep me going but without the park to run around I became a slacker...but he kept trying.

My knee...well, that's the part that is giving me real problems.

I went to the doctor...the same doctor who did surgery TWICE on my right knee...torn meniscus both times.

This time it is my LEFT knee.

The doc's resident comes in and pokes around and prods and twists and bends and straightens my knee but doesn't say much. Then the doctor comes in.

He pokes and prods and twists and bends and straightens my knee and says...

"I think it is your meniscus"

Damn...

"How did you do it?"

Running...

"You were running?"

Yes...

"How much running?"

a couple of miles...on the street...

"well, that would do it."

really?

"Really...but we won't know until you have an MRI."

Damn...

Double Damn...

Stupid girl for thinking I could run...

The only high point to all of this bunch of fun at the doc's office was that his assistant (love her) and his scheduler (love her too) didn't recognize me. The scheduler told me that when she looked at the file and looked at me she thought they gave her the wrong file.

Ok, that felt good...really, it did...I seriously don't mind it when that this the reaction I get.

So now I am having an MRI on Thursday.

Damn...

I called Dimples to whine and cry about it.

So I whined and cried about it.

He stayed positive.

I really really don't want the set-back that surgery will be.

So I had a pity party all the way home.

Stupid girl.

When I got home I was all excited to sit down and watch Oprah when I had the rug pulled out from under me and the pity party stopped.

God has a way of jerking you right back into reality when you start to care too much about your own junk.

There, on the newscast, was the news that a former student had died.

A former student that I really liked...no, make that loved.

He was a great kid. He went through a lot. I won't get into it here because I don't want to use his passing as entertainment.

Sufice it to say that all of us who knew him are heartbroken and as he is the son of someone of notoriety so the media jumped onto it.

Damn the media...

And that is all I have to say about that...except that my pity party ended there and then.

Thank you, God, for reminding this stupid girl that life has hills and then there are mountains...surgery is a hill..losing a child is a mountain...Everest....

So we waited for the great snowstorm...that never happened.

We woke up to...ice...

All the schools had cancelled classes so the kids had a snow day that wasn't a snow day.

I managed to get up to the club and gave myself a spin class that made my Dimples proud of me.

I sat on that darn bike for over an hour and a half...sweating out grief and frustration and riding while I could since I might get grounded after next week.

Stupid girl...my knee killed me later...

Last night I went to a party. Thankfully it was at Extravanessa's house across the street. I met up with GOTT and GOTTESS there (GOTTESS and I enjoy walking around parties together saying how we are both GOTT's wife.).

It was a great party...lots of fun...great to see some friends I haven't seen in a while.

And I will say that I enjoyed hearing the kudos on my weight loss...I'll be vain and admit that it felt good. Very good.

Very very good.

4 glasses of champagne, a crab cake, 2 tiny empenadas, and 2 cookies later I think it is safe to say that parties are NOT a safe place for me.

Stupid girl for not eating before the party...but Extravanessa always has great food so I didn't...

But a girl needs to let loose every once in a while and since all I had to do was walk across the street, I let loose...

And confessed to Dimples...

of course it didn't help that I was texting said confession while eating Ethiopian food with my kids.

Stupid girl...now I have a whole 2 days worth of sins to pay for.

So for now, this stupid girl is going to keep going...

And what will be will be...the MRI will let me know.

And I'll cross THAT bridge when I come to it. Because worrying about it won't change it...

And that is NOT being stupid...THAT is being smart.

Inspiration Song: "Stupid Girl" by Garbage. Because sometimes I can really be a stupid girl. Like when I go running at 5:45 in the morning on asphalt...THAT was stupid because that is how I did this to myself. I have a smart trainer...he just has a stupid client.

Bye Darlings...don't be stupid.

Days Go By

Goodbye 2010...Hello 2011!

Another year has gone but for me it has been a huge year of change...change for the better!

The days have flown by...

As I look back on the year, I have some very good memories that I will carry with me into the new year...

Last New Year's started off as I will this new year---celebrating with a quiet evening with some dear friends. Once upon a time I enjoyed a big spalshy party but now I prefer staying in the neighborhood and spending the evening having wine and dinner with people I truly love...and tonight I will get to do that, with the same people I did it with last year. THAT is a good thing...

Last February I saw my very beautiful daughter, Ke$ha Barbie, as a real grown-up girl as she took my breath away when she went to her Cotillion. She looked beautiful...

March changed my life. I went up those stairs with Precious and Adorable History teacher and realized that there was no good reason for me to spend my life getting winded as I walk up some stairs. When he asked me if I was ok, I knew that even though at that moment I wasn't...I would be...

March also brought me back to the gym...by the end of March I had decided that I needed to add exercise into the mix and so I stepped on the elliptical and pushed "go"...

In April I returned to my true love---spin class! Spinderella taught classes that reminded me that sweating on a bike was how I liked to do cardio. April also was when my son's class had Greek Festival and I had a blast helping Precious do it. The kids had fun and Precious and I survived...and I had more energy to do it since I had been working out for almost 6 weeks by then. And April is when I discovered "My Fit Foods" and I'm not tired of it yet...I love their food!

In May we presented Cinderella...and the lovely girl who was "Cinderella" in her beautiful blue gown took my breath away. Having to tell her I found a better dress than she did almost killed me because I hate making a 14 year old cry, but when a small child in the audience screamed out "Look! It's Cinderella!!!!" I burst into tears...it was a good, no make that GREAT show!

In June I stared this blog...what a difference it has made to me to be able to share my thoughts, frustrations, feelings, highs, lows, triumphs, tragedies, ups and downs, and ideas with you all. Thank you, V, for getting me to do this!

In June I also had a blast helping GOTT and TTG do a summer drama camp and I met Fitness Goddess at the gym and she showed me how to use the weight machines for a good workout. I missed The Cutest Boy in the World (TCBITW) while he was at camp but stayed busy with our camp, working out, and having fun in my pool. Oh, and it was Jane's birthday...Jane (you know, the best person in the world?!?!)...we had a blast...she has great friends to have fun with!

July---celebrating GOTT's birthday was a high point. Once again I was reminded that I absolutely cannot bowl to save my life. And once again I was reminded that GOTT can do anything...

I also got to share TCBITW's joy that he won a big award at camp and I was overjoyed to pick him up and see his adorable face again. July also brought a big goal to fruition...50 pounds lost. I also was hit with an attack of diverticulitis (ok, that is NOT a memory I will treasure). It's a lot easier to say "no" to movie theater popcorn (with all of it's fat and calories) since I know I could get very sick from it!

I also got to see the worlds best Sister-in-law and the cutest niece and nephew ever in July. I love my SIL...she is beautiful, sweet, and a great mommy. And I got to see my Aunt Gayle and my cousins...family is a treasure...

August...ah, August...school started again, football started again and I was down over 60 pounds. It was hot but I didn't mind. I loved having Precious walk right by me and then realizing it was ME because he didn't recognize me with the weight loss. And he wasn't the only teacher at the school that did that. LOVE THAT...I don't mind not being recognized because I look so much better!!!!! I also had a great time celebrating GOTESS' birthday and NOT singing karaoke with the rest of the musical theater people. I can't bowl, I can't sing...next year GOTT and GOTTESS need to have parties I am not a "fail" at!

September...it's almost a blur because it feels like all I did was photograph football games. I gifted myself with my new camera that month and Coach Sweetness has had his hands full trying to teach me how to use it properly. Oh, but I got another good gift in September---Coach Dimples! I started running his life (football-wise) at that point when I walked over and told him to quit moving the boys' backpacks and to go coach my son. I reminded him of that moment yesterday and he laughed and said he was glad I did it and barged into his life screaming and waving my arms at him to "Stop! Because I have minions to do that!". I'm glad I did it too...because now I have him helping me and he is EXCELLENT at it.

October---more football, Ke$ha Barbie's other Cotillion (and the supershort dress), and GOTT, TTG, me and the kids gave our audiences a great "Seussical" show. GOTT's Halloween party was a blast and I learned that maybe risking my blonde locks for one night of black hair was not a gamble I want to take again.

November brought another birthday for me...and I was glad to welcome it as a healthier and lighter person. TCBITW's football team went undefeated! I also started working out with Dimples because football season was over. I didn't want to start training with him until football was over because I needed him to love me as a team mom until then...and I needed to love him as a Coach...now I love him because I love him (he is a really good guy)...and because he is helping me to reshape my body and taking me to a new level of fitness. Oh, and I discovered my new obsession---Tasti D-Lite for a healthy treat that helps feed my need for something sweet. If you haven't gone yet, go and try it...try the peppermint sundae...yummy!

And now December is coming to a close. We had a nice quiet Christmas, I cooked a perfect turkey, I've worked out like mad and the scale hasn't moved but clothes are looser so I am letting it go as far as my frustration with the scale. My family is happy and healthy and I am blessed to have so many wonderful people in my life.

It's been a year of many changes.

I drink more wine but gave up fries and cookies.

I've logged about 5000 minutes on the spin bike...yes, I did break out the calculator to try and figure it out and 5000 is just about right. That is 83.333 hours...

I've spent about 10,000 minutes doing other cardio...166.67 hours...about 4.5 per week...yes, that is about right...5 hours per week at cardio and another 1-2 hours at spin...I rarely take a day off. OCD, I know...and I am lumping my training time in there too...Basically I work out for at least an hour every day but some days I do 2 hours...again, it is the OCD...

And no, Oprah has not called to tell me she is featuring me on her show and getting Vera Wang to make me a dress...yet...

In the past I have found myself making resolutions on New Year's Eve that I know I won't keep. This year I will make ones I can keep...because I know what I CAN do. I'm not going to promise myself a dress size, but I will resolve to continue to be fit and healthy. I'm going to help others as I help myself. I'm going to de-clutter my house. I'm going to think about getting a teaching certificate (notice I said "think about" it because I need to see if I can do it...but I do resolve to give it thorough research and thought). I'm going to put up a Christmas tree next year and decorate my house for the holidays. I'm going to cook another perfect turkey. I'm going to get to the point of being able to burn 400 calories in a session with Dimples (it's harder than you think). I'm going to be able to run over a mile...maybe 2...

And at some point I am going to put on my Mama's dress and wear it to a party. And I know she will be proud of me...and I will be proud of me too...

I might just wear her charm bracelet too...and as it jangles on my wrist, it will be music...

Inspiration Song: "Days Go By" by that country hunk Keith Urban. Oooh la la...Nicole Kidman is a lucky girl...

Chorus...take these words to heart:

Days go by
I can feel 'em flying
Like a hand out the window in the wind the cars go by
It's all we've been given
So you better start livin' right now
'Cause days go by



Happy New Year, Darlings! Look ahead to 2011...how can you change your life for the better? And how can you change someone else's?

Crazy Beautiful Life

"Life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death"---Mame Dennis

That might just be THE BEST (or at least ONE OF THE BEST) lines ever spoken in a movie. As I started to type this blog I was watching the incomparable Rosalind Russell portraying Mame Dennis in the movie "Auntie Mame" which is one of my all-time favorite movies. There is not another movie that can make me laugh and cry as much as that one does.

But that line has a lot of truth in it...most of us don't even go up to the banquet...we just sit and starve ourselves of experiences. And we do it (starve ourselves of life experiences) out of fear, laziness, bad prioritizing, distraction, over-scheduling, ignorance, and/or lack of motivation to just TRY something.

I want to go to the banquet...and I want to try everything...and I don't mean food...

The last few days I have done my level best to experience "crazy" and I don't mean at the mall...I'm avoiding that at all costs.

No, I'm just talking about everyday, garden-variety crazy...

Let's start with Thursday.

I had a great spin class with J'taime Jamie and then an awesome workout with Coach Dimples. I know, 2 workouts in one day may seem crazy, but it's really more like doing some cardio and then your weight workout so it's not THAT crazy. I call it my "two-a-days"...after all, I am working with a football coach. After my Dimples time I dashed out to get a haircut from my French/Spanish hairdresser who I shall just call by his name because I can't come up anything better...Fernando. Isn't that the most perfect name for a French Spaniard that is gorgeous?

Fernando and I have been together for over 21 years. We have lasted longer than many marriages (including one of his). We have survived divorces (his), re-marriages (his), miscarriages (mine), deaths of friends and family (both of us), children trauma (both of us). We have grown up and grown middle-aged together. When I first became his client his hair was longer than mine...not anymore..

So Fernando cuts my hair and then after drying it he whips out the curling iron and starts to turn me into a vision of a fat Victoria's Secret model. I told him I was headed to church...I swear I think he thought I said "club". So I showed up at "Lessons and Carols" at the church looking a bit like a woman who was looking for a dance partner. Oh well, the 14 year old girls loved it...

After "Lessons..." I went with GOTT and his family to see a production of...well, I won't say because, sadly, it was pretty dreadful. It is a show that is dear to GOTT and I but this particular production brought me to tears---and not in a good way. Because the director totally ruined the show...he ruined a beautiful show with a beautiful message. At least the actors looked like they were having fun...

And then I came home to the teenage party...crazy Thursday...

Friday amped up the crazy...

Christmas Breakfast for the middle school and Lessons and Carols at my son's school was on board for the morning. The crazy hair was still curly so I just left it and rolled with it. I helped GOTT and TTG with the Lessons and Carols (basically a church service where we sing carols and the story of Jesus' birth is told). I got to play stage manager on Stage left and wore a headset so I cold hear GOTT booming through with instructions like God from above. GOTT likes to talk into the headset throughout the shows so I got a running commentary and his instructions to the light board operator and spotlight boys along with enjoying songs like "Breath of Heaven"...confusing to say the least...after saying "Merry Christmas" to our friends at school and having lunch, my boys left to go hunting and I hit the gym after conferring with Dimples as to whether I needed a day off...I didn't so I went...

But that wasn't the crazy part of the day.

Crazy came later...

I had 2 parties to go to that night. For someone who NEVER has a social life, having 2 things to do the same night was a bit of a thrill...and frustrating as I didn't want to miss a moment of either party.

First up was an all-girls affair at MizLiz's house. GREAT party. GREAT fun. GREAT group of girls. Hard to tear myself away. I was so excited to be invited to hang with that fun group of girls that I was happy to hear that next year she and the hostesses of the other party were going to confer before setting dates so that she and the rest of us can fully enjoy BOTH parties!

So after a little champagne, lamb chops, and gossip I head to the C&B's party held at the C's house. GREAT party. GREAT fun. Got to see all my friends. Everyone looked gorgeous and I do mean gorgeous! And I got to see some friends I don't get to see all the time (shout out to my girlfriend PB who I just discovered is also a South Texas Chica...no wonder I love her so...) and it was pretty nice to slink around the party in something cute instead of a tent.

I was rocking a couture dress...from TARGET. (Tar-zhay if you please...).

All yours for $29...

I avoided the crazy at that party by declining to sip Goldshlagger from the ice sculpture. There was no way that was going to work out for me. Didn't want to mess up the $29 dress. Plus it was time to move on to Diet Coke...

Crazy happened after I left...

I went outside to the valet to get my car. My feet were KILLING me in my stilleto boots (I had them on all day except for gym time) and it was midnight so Cinderella was ready to leave the ball. You know, because of the shoes...and Fairy Godmother's magic only lasts so long. Plus I had a teenager home and her curfew was earlier than mine...

So I'm waiting for my car and my friend's husband comes out to get their car and we start talking about working out, excercise,the Racquet Club, spin class, my weight loss etc. This is a man I have known for about 6 years...very sweet guy. So we are talking and laughing and I don't really notice the guy or guys also waiting for cars. I'm just talking to my friend. My car comes and I hug him goodbye and tell him to wish his wife a Merry Christmas and get in my car and go home.

I'm home about 20 minutes (boots OFF! false eyelashes OFF! makeup OFF!) and I get a call from the house where the party is. I start thinking I must have left something there or something must have dropped out of my purse because why else would someone call at 12:25 at night? I answer the phone and my friend K informs me that I caused a fight.

A fight?

How did I cause a fight? I was gone from the party...

But it seems that some bozo waiting for his car while my friend and I were talking decided after I left that he thought my friend was bothering me.

Bothering me?

We were talking about WORKING OUT and laughing about it...we are FRIENDS.

But the other guy was drunk and decided to make something out of it. Apparently, he thought he was defending my honor...against a man who was asking me how I can stand to be on the arc trainer for more than 5 minutes.

Maybe he (the drunk) hates running on the treadmill as much as I do and felt the need to say something...LOL...

Or maybe, and this is the part I hate, it was because my friend is of a different culture that this guy decided to get ugly with him. And if that is it, may the guy burn...because my friends are my people...it has nothing to do with culture, religion, sexual preference, or sex of the person---I am blind to the oustide of people but only care about the inside of people and their hearts. But sadly that is the theory of at least one witness/bystander as to why the guy got so hot with my friend. I think it was called "Jack Daniels" or maybe "Johnnie Walker"...

But in any case he got ugly with my friend and punches were thrown.

I looked ok that night but not enought to start a ballroom brawl.

My friend was fine and the drunk got taken home by someone else and now I have a very silly story to tell.

And THAT my friends is CRAZY CRAZY CRAZY...

Saturday came and went with little to no crazy...I worked out, I had lunch with a former student, I had a blast taking photos of my friend Jay Vee and her wonderful family, and I had a great dinner with my friend Tiny Dy-no-mite and her husband who took us out for a great meal and conversation. Don't you love a good day?

But here is the BEST part of my day...I jumped on the scale and I HAD TO MOVE THE BIG BAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Woo-hoo!!!!!!!!!!! I was under 200. I weighed myself 7 times (ok, I guess that is CRAZY). I jumped off and on that scale 7 times. I weighed myself again after working out. I texted Dimples and professed my undying love for him and the damn hill and the black rubberband and promised to be a good girl and drag his cute ass up that hill endlessly. He was super proud of me. I told him "who needs Santa when I have you"...

I'll confess when I looked at the scale...I cried...

So since Saturday was (relatively---except for the weighing myself a bajillion times) crazy free I guess I thought I needed to double the crazy for today. But today's crazy is all me...all me and my doing and my OCD...

Crazy #1:

I got on the scale this morning. Dimples told me not to do this but I am compelled by my OCD to weigh myself every day...sometimes more than once. I was back over 200. In a big way. Like 3 pounds. So how did I gain 5 pounds in one day? I know know know that I didn't screw up the scale yesterday when it went down, but today's number made me cry---again. I haven't confessed this to Dimples because I know I will get a (sweetly given) lecture---remember, he's good at talking "woman" these days. But really, does the scale have to screw with my emotions so much? I know I shouldn't let it, but it does...

Crazy #2:

I got to the gym, set myself up a spin bike, got my towels and water, was strapping on my cycle shoes and I discover that I have left my heart monitor at home. I consider just jumping on the bike and going but my OCD got the better of me and I knew I couldn't do the workout without the heart monitor. So I went home to get it. Yes, I was totally ready to get on the bike...the iPod was even going, but no heart monitor meant I didn't know how hard I was working so I went home to get it. Problem was, I was out of gas so I had to gas up before going home. That little adventure cost me 20 minutes. How OCD is that? That I would do all of that just to be sure I could tell how hard I was working? Really? Really...

And then I spent 75 minutes on the spin bike and did weights...because of the scale thing...that makes #2 double crazy...

Crazy #3:

I called my friend K back to make sure I wasn't drunk or dreaming the fight story...I wasn't (drunk or dreaming)...it really happened...not sure whether to be ashamed, embarrassed, or think it is funny as hell...

Crazy #4:

I got on the treadmill and ran...even though I am not supposed to. Shhhh...don't tell Dimples! I only did 1/2 mile...but I might sneak back on it tomorrow...the crazy part is that I WANTED to run, even with my knee. Even crazier...it doesn't hurt...actually since it didn't hurt Dimples won't mind...and he will expect me to do more running on Tuesday when we train. He showed up last week and informed me that a better use of my time, when I beat him to the park, would be for me to run or walk fast around the track to get my heartrate up instead of checking my email. Since I like being "teacher's pet" I guess I will be running when he arrives next time. Again, I don't know why I am so compliant with that man...oh yes...he is helping me change my body...that's why...

Crazy #5:

My daughter had dinner with me tonight. In a restaurant. With her boyfriend...

Yes, Ke$ha Barbie eating with me in public with her boyfriend is crazy...and beautiful...

I had more crazy today---shopping at Target, Toys R Us, and Best By (for a family we have "adopted" for Xmas), and I almost got hit by 3 cars as I walked across the parking lot.

Yes, it was a crazy day...

I hope yours was much much saner...but given the time of year, I doubt it...

Inspiration Song: "Crazy Beatiful Life" by Ke$ha...I love her music, even if she constantly sings about getting drunk...it is fun to run/workout/spin to...

Bye Darlings...embrace the crazy...it's better than fighting it...

Do You Believe in Magic?

So, do you?

Believe in magic?

Because right now I need to...I want to...

And I pray that Coach Dimples is a wizard because he is going to need a magic wand to undo what I did tonight.

I ate pizza...

3 slices...

3 large slices...

cheese...

ARGH!

I've been doing so so so good...but tonight I gave into the the cheesey goodness of Fuzzy's pizza. The lava-like cheese almost burned my mouth...too bad it didn't because maybe I would have stopped.

I know what my mistake was (other than saying "no" to going to Fuzzy's)...I should have ordered a salad first and filled up on that.

2 slices arent' exactly behaving but 3 is going overboard and I feel kinda sick from it.

I will confess my sin to Coach when he trains me tomorrow...it will make him push me just that much further and harder...I feel several runs up the hill as punishment.

What is surprising to me is how GUILTY I feel about it. Not guilty towards my trainer...he doesn't really care what I eat because HE'S not eating it, but he is trying to help me stay on the right course so he makes me log my meals.

No, the guilt is that I let myself down.

I let myself get carried away by food when I knew I should have stopped at 2 and I knew that the 3rd piece was going overboard and I didn't really need it.

A year ago I would have had 4 pieces so I guess I should console myself with that.

And I had done so good...no popcorn at the movies, only half of my bun with my brisket sandwich at lunch...a brisket sandwich that was made with only lean cuts of the brisket, none of the fatty stuff...and cole slaw, not potato salad...and fruit as my snack....

And today I was feeling "thinner"...not "skinny" but "thinner".

The Cutest Boy in the World looked at me before we left for lunch and said:
"Who are you and what have you done with my mom?"

Wow do I love that son of mine...

I mean, I still have a belly and thunder thighs but they are way smaller than they were this time last year.

We went to see the new Harry Potter movie tonight. It was a great adaptation of the book and I really enjoyed it.

But the BEST part of the movie was not even in the movie...it was when I sat in my seat...and I wasn't squeezed in. My thighs didn't hit the sides of the chair. I didn't need/want to raise the armrest to make more room. I FIT in the chair.

I FIT IN THE CHAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!

Boy was that a great feeling...

And the movie itself was great. I love the Harry Potter movies. They are magical!

I used to want to be a witch...not a bad witch, but more like "Samantha" in "Bewitched". Just to twitch my nose and make something wonderful happen.

Or to have a magic wand that I could wave and make things happen...just like Harry, Ron, and Hermione.

Did I tell you I was Bellatrix LeStrange (a Harry Potter character---a real bad witch) for Halloween at GOTT and GOTTESS' party? GOTT was Lucius Malfoy---he looked just like him. It was an awesome party and I liked the fact that I got to look completely different.

I wore my old witch dress---it is 10 years old and I was pretty excited to get back into it.

But the hair was the hard part...because Bellatrix has wild, curly black hair.

And I hate wigs...

I mean, I really really really hate wigs...

So I sprayed my hair with black hair color...

Everyone was terrified it wouldn't come out.

I almost left it in for church the next morning, but it felt too nasty to go to bed with it so I washed it out when I got home. 3 shampoos later, it was out and I was back to blonde.

GOTT and GOTTESS were pretty happy to see that I was blonde again when I got to church the next morning. My friend Coach Cuteness saw the black hair at the party so he was surprised when I walked in with blonde, not purple or black, hair the next day.

I don't have a photo...but it was pretty awesome...and scary...

I'll not be doing that again!

The hair part, not the witch part...

Because, after all, I am a witch...sometimes...at least my children will tell you so...

So, do you believe in magic?

Because we all have magic in us...and we don't need magic wands to do it. We don't need pixie dust. We don't need spells, charms, or enchantments.

We make magic every day...

Because it is magic when you can make a child smile...

And it is magic when someone says "I love you"...

Magic happens when we do something for someone else for no reason other than to help...

Teachers make magic happen in the classroom when they get their students excited about learning...

Magic happens on the stage everytime children sing or dance or act...same with adults singing, acting, dancing...

And it is magic when we give our hearts...

But sometimes we need a little help to make magic happen...and I'm going to need some magical help from my trainer.

So I hope that Dimples is a wizard, because the pizza damaage is pretty extensive and right now I want to lose weight, not maintain...and he is bound and determined to help me do it.

So hopefully tomorrow he can look at me and say:

"Expeliamus!!!"

and make it go away...

Otherwise, I predict a lot of running up that damn hill...

Thank goodness he does it with me...or I might have to find my magic wand and say "Expeliamus" to him...and I would hate to do that...

Inspiration Song: "Do You Believe In Magic?" by The Lovin' Spoonful...because it is so fun and just one of the many songs with the word "magic" in it on my iPod...but this was the most appropriate...

So, do you believe in magic?

Bye darlings...