Oh come on now...I'm not talking about myself...
I mean, hey, I look better but I'm not a head turner. Not yet...
Seriously, I don't think of myself in those terms...pretty woman...that was my mother's job.
No, I'm talking about the movie. THE movie...you know, the one with Julia Roberts and Richard Gere?
I just watched it for the 478th time...and yes, I still cry at the end and I still love the shopping scene (definite fantasy of mine...and yes, in my fantasty Richard Gere is there to approve and pay), and I still love love love when she puts on the red gown and he snaps the jewelery box closed on her gloved hand. (You know he---Gere---improvised that scene and Garry Marshall the director loved it when Julia laughed so he kept it in..brilliant!)
I love that red gown. I've never owned a red gown. I have a red cocktail dress that I have worn only once to a party 2 weeks after my mother passed away...I need to try it on...I hope it is too big...
So what is it about a movie like Pretty Woman that will keep me watching it again and again?
I have a some movies I can see over and over (including the aforementioned Pretty Woman):
Finding Nemo (yes, Finding Nemo...)
Gone With the Wind (duh!)
Auntie Mame (ohmygawd so good)
Sense and Sensibility (love Jane Austen)
Emma (see above)
Pride and Prejudice (see above...both versions...)
50 First Dates (the best Adam Sandler movie in my opinion)
Muriel's Wedding (love GOOD Australian movies)
The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert (see above...Australian)
Strictly Ballroom (see above...Australian)
Notting Hill(so cute)
Four Weddings and a Funeral (love GOOD British movies)
Love, Actually (I have a thing for Hugh Grant and Colin Firth...maybe you noticed)
and one movie I can't really explain why, because I don't know why, but I watch it repeatedly:
The Fifth Element
Yes, that last one is a rather crazy addition, but it is true...I watch it just about every time it is on tv...
I went to see "The King's Speech" last night with my friend KB and her daughter...I highly recommend the movie. 1/2 the cast of the Harry Potter movies is in it...but more importantly it has Colin Firth and Guy Pearce (he of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert). Really good stuff...
But, back to Pretty Woman...why am I obsessed with that movie?
Maybe it's the fairy tale of it all. I've read that originally the movie was to be very dark and not have the happy ending. That Julia Robert's character was to be addicted to drugs and not end up with Gere's character.
But the filmakers changed it and gave us the Cinderella ending.
Because we all want the fairy tale, right?
But then again, fairy tales are often filled with monsters, wicked stepmothers, towers guarded by dragons, bad magic, and glass slippers.
Who can really wear a glass slipper?
You would cut your foot...
But it is fun to live in the fantasy of it all...a place where everything has a happy ending. Where you live happily ever after.
Real life isn't that easy...even if you had to slay some dragons.
But then again, we all slay dragons daily.
I don't mean the fire-breathing sort, but dragons in our own world.
For some, dragons can be addictions: food, drugs, alchohol.
For some, dragons can be ailments, pains, hurts, and disabilities...and they can be physical or emotional or mental.
For others, the dragons to slay might be prejudice or fear.
And the dragons can also be bad relationships, debt, job loss, or just plain laziness to change things in your life.
You all are familiar with my dragons. You have been introduced to them many times.
The huge purple one with the large wings is called "Frida, food addiction". But if I keep her fed with healthy food her fire goes out and she actually purrs.
The pink one, the smaller one with the small wings is called "Cara, co-dependent". She's the one who needs lots and lots of positive feedback, applause, and petting. Once she is petted, or someone "talks woman" to her (like Dimples), she simmers down and becomes a lap dragon...albeit one who still needs petting to stay there.
"Leslie the Lazy" is the orange one who is large and slobby. She's been too fat to fly in the past. But lately she has been found flying about on a leash (with a handsome knight holding said leash) and she has trimmed down quite a bit. She actually likes her outings with the knight (he doesn't wear shining armour, but rather gym shorts and a t-shirt) and has trimmed up quite a bit. We may have to rename her "Leslie the lithe"...
Oh, the little blue one in the corner? The one with the feathered wings? she's "Darla Depressed"...she's been really quiet lately. In fact, I think she might be ready to find a new home. She's been hanging around for 5 years and I think she knows she isn't wanted anymore. Seems the other dragons have put her in her place.
A new dragon came to visit...not sure how to control her...she's red and she's called "Odette OCD"...she gets out of control pretty regularly. She guards the scale and breathes a lot of fire to make the other dragons hop around and get nervous. She likes to chase the poor knight around too...breathes a lot of fire on him when she doesn't get her way. Often times the knight tells her she has to stay in the dragon lair and not come out to play and then she breathes a lot of fire...so he lets her out pretty often but makes her rest...or at least tries to...he also uses soothing words on her like he does Cara, the co-dependent dragon. But Odette never purrs...she just roars...
So controlling the dragons isn't easy...and the poor knight who tries to help out is doing a good job but I'm sure there are days he wants to explain to the dragons that he is just a trainer, not a psychiatrist.
He has learned to talk "woman" ("dragon") pretty well. GOTT learned to do so to my dragons a long time ago...so did TTG...and Precious is fluent in it. Bacchus just feeds the dragons wine to control them and so they stay away from him except when they need a drink. The husband who lives near the lair...notsomuch...he's been dealing with the dragons for too long. I think he is just waiting to see what new dragons move in to take the place of the old ones.
There is a princess upstairs who has her own lair of dragons...I'm not sure that her knight (her boyfriend) truly knows how many dragons live up there but sometimes I seek his help to slay them (Princess Ke$ha Barbie's dragons). Her dragons are led by the hideous one called "Tina the Teenage Girl" dragon...she's pretty ugly...I don't like her very much and she breathes so much fire on me that I often feel quite burned.
But seriously, we live in a real world...and yes, the dragons are a silly metaphor (or is it a simile? I was never very good at grammar) for our problems and failings.
But inside all of us is a knight who can slay them all...and you can call on other knights to put on their armor and help you.
I have an army of knights...but most of the dragon slaying is falling to Dimples these days. He's pretty capable...even if he drives a black Tahoe instead of a white steed...
I'm re-writing the end of my fairy tale. Where once-upon-a-time there was a fat unhappy, unhealthy woman who did nothing to take care of herself but rushed about helping others, there is now a princess (people, I have ALWAYS been a princess...)who still runs about helping others (she likes to rescue the knights sometimes), the new princess of the realm wears her tiara proudly on a body that is becoming more worthy of satin and ermine.
Satin is a scary fabric for ANY body...just look at any movie star that didn't wear Spanx under her Oscar gown...
I want the fairy tale ending...even if I have to work for it...
Because at the end of the yellow brick road at the bottom of the tower in Never Never Land is a crown and glass slippers (Christian Louboutins?) and a beautiful gown (my mother's dress)and even if I have to fight off witches, and ogres, and spindles on spinning wheels, and have to climb a tower...I'm gonna get there on my own...no fairy godmother needed (although if her name is Oprah I will invite her in and put on some tea)...just a few knights to hold the dragons at bay while I put on the sparkly (red?) dress and get ready to dazzle the kingdom.
Inspiration Song: "Pretty Woman"...Roy Orbison for you purists...but I really love the David Lee Roth/Van Halen version...
Inspiration Movie: "Pretty Woman"...Julia and Richard at their best...
Bye Darlings...slay your dragons, don't feed them...