Running Up that Hill

Today you get two blogs for the price of one...actually "Santa Baby" is just a silly little thing on my part...if you missed it and want to read my reworking of the song, look to the right side of the page where it lists post and click on it...

Well, I must have done something right because I was able to walk today and the knee wasn't killing me. I got through spin class with absolutely no pain.

It did, however, hurt a bit after working out with Dimples today...but that was because I ran. So we stopped the running part and the hurting stopped.

Dang...just when I thought I was going to like to run...nah...I don't think I was ever going to LIKE running...

He did get creative...

we went to the PLAYGROUND!

But that was only after he made me do some horrendous thing on the ground that kept him laughing at me...and me covered in grass and dead leaves. I won't even try and describe the torture that the excercise was, but suffice it to say that had I ever been a debutante and took a "Texas Dip" bow, this excercise would have made that easy...

OK, I'll describe it...because you might really want to do it yourself.

Lie on the ground. Bend your right knee. Raise your right arm straight up (like a "chimnney" he tells me). Left arm down on the ground at a 45 degree angle. Push up with left arm, keeping right arm straight up in the air. Slide left leg under right knee. Use left hand and right quad to stand up. Keep right arm straight up. Do the opposite to go down. Reapeat 10 times FAST. Change sides...

Hell...it was hell...

And then we jogged over to the playground (a tiny jog) and I got all excited because I thought he was going to push me on the swings but instead he made me use the playground equipment to do push ups and pull-ups and lat pulls and nothing nearly as fun as swinging.

But it was a change of pace.

After 20 minutes or making a circuit of it we jogged back to the park part and he decided that I needed to run up that damn hill.

I knew when I found the park for us that the hill was going to be the devil in my day. And every workout he finds a new way to torture me on the hill. But today he truly outdid himself...

Because he made me run up the hill to him....over and over...run as fast as I could up and then jog down...multiple times....

When I got to the point where I was ready to throw up he grabbed the huge black rubber band thing and had me hold one end and he held the other and I pulled HIM up the hill...while I went backwards.

I don't like to go backwards...so the whole time he was telling me I was fine.

I had flashbacks to pulling my heifer around. He was like my heifer...I had to pull pull pull to get her (and him) to go anywhere.

See, once upon a time I had a heifer who was wonderfully named...

5

yes, the number 5...

because it was her brand number.

I named my steers names, but my cows were just numbers...I don't know why...

My steers had names like:
Sirloin (peverse, I know)
Filet Mignon (again, perverse...)
Idi Amin (he was big, black, and mean)
and...
Monster (my BFF Amy named him because he was so big)

Monster was a sweetheart. 5 was not. She was awful. Idi Amin was awful but I sold him after the first stock show. Monster was my ticket to championships...and so was 5.

I showed them at the stock shows my Senior year of high school. I calculated that because of livetock shows (and one golf tournament that I think I finally broke 200, yes 200, in) I only went to school 5 days during the month of February.

5 liked to drag me around...she would just start going and I would hang onto her halter for dear life. My friend Trey once deciced he was going to "show her who's boss". He told me that since she had control of me I was never going to control her so he was going to fix it and do it.

His brother and I had a moment of joy as we waited for him to "show her who's boss"...

I think his heel track marks are still in the pasture....

Needless to say, 5 was still the boss.

One day I had to leave high school because of 5. I got called to the principal's office (that was a big "oooooohhhh...she's in trouble" moment in my Trig class) and he told me the following:

"Tiny called. He says 5 is loose. He says that you have to get to the barn and get her because all the men are in the rafters".

Then he asked me what that meant.

I asked him if I could leave and he said I could if I explained the message.

I told him that basically she was horrible and if she was loose, the men that worked in the cattle barn were scared of her and she was obviously causing terror.

He let me go.

I got to the barn and found 3 men in the rafers (cursing in Spanish) and Tiny (who weighed 350 pounds) and Hank (who was 6'7") locked in their office.

And one very mad cow stoming about like she was a bull.

We had a little showdown. She stood at one end of the barn and I stood at the other.

I looked her in the eye. She glared.

And then I yelled at her to get back into her stall and quit being so bad.

I know you think I am kidding. And I know you think I am lying when I tell you she put her head down and walked into her stall.

She snorted as I shut the door. The cursing in Spanish continued.

I left the barn and went back to Trig...which was over by then...so I guess I went to English...

She pulled one other stunt on me and drug me around the ring during the San Antonio Livestock show. I never let go of her halter. I think my boot skid marks are still in the arena.

I won the show.

The judge told me that the only reason he didn't toss me out was that I didn't let go.

So today as I was dragging Dimles up the hill all I could think of was 5 and how she would refuse to go where I tried to drag her. I told him he was a heifer...and explained...

Thank goodness he is a cute heifer or I wouldn't have bothered with all the pulling and dragging...

I'll save my Monster stories for another blog...they are good but long and I think one or two cow tales are enough for one blog.

I still have 5's trophies...I am looking at them as I type this blog. She lived a happy cow life after we won all that we could on the stock show circuit.

But I bet she terrorized the other cows...

And back to my workout today...he made me do it all...the running up the hill/jogging down 5 times, the pulling him up the hill 5 times...he made me do it all...TWICE...

my quads are screaming...

I think tonight is a night for Advil...and wine...it's a great combination!

Inspiration Song: "Running Up That Hill" by Kate Bush (the original and haunting and beautiful)or the version by Placebo that is strangely beautiful...both are good...I have both on my iPod...

Lyrics:

It doesn't hurt me.
Do you want to feel how it feels?
Do you want to know, know that it doesn't hurt me?
Do you want to hear about the deal that I'm making?
You, It's you and me.

And if I only could,
I'd make a deal with God,
And I'd get him to swap our places,
Be running up that road,
Be running up that hill,
Be running up that building.
Say, If I only could, oh...

You don't want to hurt me,
But see how deep the bullet lies.
Unaware, I'm tearing you asunder.
Ooh, There is thunder in our hearts.

Is there so much hate for the ones who love?
Tell me we both matter don't we?

You,
It's you and me,
It's you and me who won't be unhappy.

And if I only could,
I'd make a deal with God,
And I'd get him to swap our places,
Be running up that road,
Be running up that hill,
Be running up that building.
Say, If I only could, oh...

You,
It's you and me,
It's you and me who won't be unhappy.

Come on baby, come on darling
Let me steal this moment from you now
Oh come on angel, come on come on darlin'
Let's exchange the experience oh...

And if I only could,
I'd make a deal with God,
And I'd get him to swap our places,
Be running up that road,
Be running up that hill,
With no problems...

Say if I only could,
I'd make a deal with God,
And I'd get him to swap our places,
Be running up that road,
Be running up that hill,
With no problems...

Say if I only could,
I'd make a deal with God,
And I'd get him to swap our places,
Be running up that road,
Be running up that hill,
With no problems...

Say, If I only could...
Oh...
Be running up that hill,
With no problems...

If only I could,
Be running up that hill...

Bye Darlings...go running up that hill and see what is up there...for me it is just my fabulous and adorable trainer...but on the other side is...fitness!