Don't You Evah

Don't you ever...
Wish you were Samantha from Bewitched?
So you could just twitch your nose and things would get done...things like the dishes? Or the Christmas cards you forgot to take a photo for could just be whipped up? The house could get cleaned magically? And that Esmerelda could just appear to take care of your kids?

I do...


Don't you ever...
Wish you were Jeannie from "I Dream of Jeannie"?
So that you could cross your arms and blink your eyes and you could be suddenly transported somewhere else? Avoiding traffic? Or you could do the blink thing and suddenly you have a new outfit on?

I do...


Don't you ever...
Wish there were more hours in a day?
So you could SLEEP? Or just get things done?

I do...


Don't you ever...
Wonder why your body craves things that are BAD for you but you never have a craving for things like celery or non-fat yogurt? Why do I have to crave CRAVE cupcakes?

I do...


Don't you ever...
Wish that the Victoria's Secret models would all suddenly get fat?

I do...


Don't you ever...
Wish that the work/school week was 2 days long and the "weekend" was 5 days long?

I do...


Don't you ever...
Feel like you want vacation break to be over...24 hours after it started because you are tired of hearing the words "I am sooooooooooooo bored" come from your child's mouth?

I do...


Don't you ever...
Wish that your husband could turn into Brad Pitt, Ryan Reynolds, Alexsander Skaarsgard, or Maks from Dancing with the Stars...for a few hours? Just for fun...just to look at...and if it is Maks, let's dance...

I do...oh, I do...


Don't you ever...
Wish that chocolate had no calories? But still tasted just as good? or that cream cheese and butter have the same calorie count as say...celery?

I do...


Don't you ever...
Want the skin that hangs from your arms like bat wings to just magically disappear overnight and suddenly you would wake up with Madonna's arms?

I do...although Coach Dimples tells me to forget about her arms because they are "too cut" and not "all that"...but I will take "cut" over "bat wings" anyday...what does he know, he is a MAN...


Don't you ever...
Wish that there was no such thing as a size 00?

I do...too much pressure...makes an 8 look big...


Don't you ever...
Wish that Spinderella, Jay Vee, or J'taime Jaime taught a spin class every day?

I do...and I know that one is very personal...but I luv luv luv spinning with them...


Don't you ever...
Wish that it was as easy to excercise as it is to sit on the couch?

I do...all the time...and I wish I could burn the same amount of calories sitting on said couch...


Don't you ever...
Want $10 wine to taste as good as $40 wine?

I do...and sometimes it does...and sometimes the $40 stuff tastes worse than $10...


Don't you ever...
Find yourself obsessed with the silliest things?

I do...and right now my current obsessions are (in no particular order): salmon, Oprah, Caslon t-shirts from Nordstrom, Tom Ford Black Orchid perfume, my black boots, pants from "Lucy", and getting below a certain point on the scale by Christmas...oh, and salmon...I've eaten it for like every meal this week...what's with that?


Don't you ever...
Want to say to your spouse "are you kidding me, Bozo?" when you discover he is TAPING the football game he just watched live at the stadium and it knocked off something you wanted to tape?

I do...and I have...


Don't you ever...
Wish that life was on DVR and you could rewind it?

I do...so you could enjoy all the good stuff over and over again...and skip over the bad/boring/hard stuff...


Don't you ever...
Wish that you could put your husband on mute?

I do...all the time...can you tell he has irritated me today?


Don't you ever...
Wish Santa really existed?

I do...and he does...


Don't you ever...
Feel that God has blessed you greatly and that all the stuff you complain about it just silly?

I do...and He has...and I'm grateful for my blessings...


So I will stop whining now.

I've actually had a pretty great week. I've eaten enough salmon to feel like I need to swim upstream but cheated a few times and don't feel guilty about it. I've had great workouts with Dimples---and he got me off my weight loss plateau and back into "losing"...even if it took pulling his cute self up a nasty hill. Thank goodness he is becoming an expert at speaking "woman" to me and rarely slips into "coach" mode these days...and thank goodness for those dimples because it makes it easier to deal with the pain he is dishing out to me when he smiles as he tells me to do it. I had some really fun spin classes that were actually FUN. I went and heard a choral concert that moved me to tears...especially when my friend's daugher Katherine the Great sang a solo during the "Messiah" portion of the program. Beautiful music always moves me. I got to go to a fun party and see my old "soccer mom" friends from The Cutest Boy in the World's old soccer team. I even had some people (including some good looking men and several very sweet children) tell me I looked "pretty" and "hot" and even got a few "wows"...I'll take that...even though I think they were all just being sweet...but it is nice to hear...

I got nothin' to complain about...


Inspiration Song:
"Don't You Evah" by Spoon...because it is such a cool song...and on my workout list these days and gets heavy play...

Bye Darlings...don't you ever...stop counting your blessings!