Friday, December 23, 2011

Santa Baby 2011

Hey friends out there in blogland...the Christmas rush has gotten to me and I've neglected feeding my brain with my writing...I've been using all of my creativity to decorate my house!

So yes, if you have read past blogs you will know I have not decorated for Christmas since my Mom died...but this year I did...and it felt really good...and I know she is glad I finally found my Christmas spirit again.

But then again, Christmas is not about trees, and lights, and's about the greatest gift of all...Jesus Christ.

But being the humans we are, and God knows this as He created us, we do tend to want things and yes, I have a Christmas list...

So here is what I would love to find under my tree this year:

College acceptances for Ke$ha Barbie...I need those more than anything

Scholarships and grants for Ke$ha Barbie...since she is looking at pricey art programs

A few more pounds gone off the old body...but hey, last year I was praying to be a 12 and this year I am an 8 so I'm not complaining

I want Oprah back on tv...just sayin

I want my son to get into the high school of his choice...after all, he is the Cutest Boy in the World...who wouldn't want him? I keep telling Ke$ha Barbie not to mess it up for him at her school since that is his first choice of where to go

I'd like to find the courage to have my tummy tuck...I'm getting there but I'm not there yet

Oh...and the TIME to have the tummy tuck

I'm gonna have to sell my house this summer so I'd like a really nice buyer who will take good care of this place that I love, and an easy transaction, and for me to find a nice little house that I can live in with The Cutest Boy in the World and his sister when she deigns to visit us.

And I wouldn't mind a nice male friend to spend time with...I don't need a serious love affair, but just someone to drink some wine with and go to the movies with...

I don't need a guy who will take me out to fancy places, I'd rather just cook dinner for us and watch "Modern Family" (no, I will not force a man to watch "Glee" or "Project Runway All Stars" with me but he would earn big time brownie points if he did).

On my "bucket list" for the guy:
Must have a JOB(!!!)...I don't think I need to explain that one
Must make me laugh (a lot)
Must like to workout or at least take care of himself and occasionally enjoy working out with me (he does not have to do spin class because I will "own" him on that...)
He can have kids (in fact, I'd like that because I love children and I'm better with other people's teenagers than I am my own)
I want him to like to have "guys night" because I need "girls night"
I want a guy who likes to hold my hand
And he damn sure better tell me I'm pretty (often...very often)
And that I smell good (yes, I am Tinkerbell---I need applause to I need a man who compliments me)
A man who likes to eat healthy but will order fries so I can steal a few
He's gotta like red wine...because I'm not so much of a white wine girl
He can drink what he likes but he better know to always order me Stoli if I'm not drinking wine
I want a man who knows I like lilies and not roses...and will bring me lilies
I want a guy who will go to a museum with me...and I will go to a baseball game with him
I'd like a man who will come and watch my son play lacrosse...but he can avoid coming to wrestling meets because I would if I could
I'd like to meet a man who will eat sushi, Indian, Thai, and Ethiopian with me...and grill me a really good steak (very very rare...and I mean how my steak is done...not that it is rare to find a man who can grill a steak)
I'd like a man to go to the movie with who will order popcorn and let me eat a lot of it even though I tell him I won't...and let me put jalepenos on it...and won't ever make me watch anything in 3D or with Bruce Willis in it...

So yeah, it would be nice to find a male friend to spend some time I said, I'm not looking for a husband...I'm looking for a FRIEND...and I don't need him happens when it happens...

And no, I'm not going on anytime soon...or don't suggest it...

I'm not THAT ready to find someone...if it happens, it happens....

When I looked at my "Santa Baby" blog from last year I had to smile...cause Santa brought me most of it with a few exceptions...

I did get the "size 12" but NOW I'm an 8!!!!!
I did get the running shoes...but the orthopedic surgeon shut that down so now i just spin
I did get to wear the flirty skirts and I do it all the time...along with my dangerous heels!
I still have my Dimples to help me along...and he got me well under the 200 pounds I was asking for last year...

So here, again with apologies to Earth Kitt and whoever wrote the original version of this song is my version of "Santa Baby 2011 edition"

Santa baby, slip a new man under the tree, for me
I’m an awfully good catch
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight

Santa baby, a guy who likes to enjoy some red wine would be fine
I’ll wait up for you dear
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight

Think of all the fun I’ve missed
I really want a friend and it be nice to be kissed
Next year I could be oh so good
If you’d check of my Christmas list

Santa honey, I want some things that cannot be bought
Not a lot
I’ve been an angel all year
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight

Santa cutie, there’s one thing I really do need, the deed
To my OWN little house
Santa cutie and hurry down the chimney tonight

Santa baby, fill my stocking with college accepts and checks
To pay for art school
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight

Come and trim my Christmas tree
With lots of colleges saying that they want Ke$ha Barbie
I really do believe in you
Let’s see if you believe in me
Boo doo bee doo

Santa baby, forgot to mention one little thing NO RING
I don’t need a new spouse
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight

Hurry down the chimney tonight
Hurry down the chimney tonight

Inspiration Song: "Santa Baby" as sung by Eartha Kitt...the original, the best...

Bye Darlings...I hope Santa brings you all the goodies on your list...Merry Christmas!!!!!

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