In fact it was really 6 long weeks and 2 days...
6 weeks and 2 days since I was on my beloved Keiser spin bike.
Today we had a reunion.
I'm not entirely sure I want to get back together with my drug of choice...
nah, I'm kidding....
It. Was. Awesome.
I loved every second of Je t'aime Jamie's class...every single second.
Even when I wanted to puke...
Even when my heart rate went to 170 (high high high for me) but I never lost my breath...
Even though my heart rate stayed at 160 (and usually it only "visits" there)
Even when the thought of how sore I was going to be hit me at the 48:28 minute mark...and yes, just a few hours later I am sore...don't care...
Even when she played a country song (sorry, I like country in a bar but not spin class but others enjoy it so I just roll with it)
Even when the sweat was rolling off me so fast I couldn't mop it off fast enough (ok maybe that is TMI)
Even when Tamster laughed and said "sheeeee's back and so is the bad music" when Je T'aime Jamie played my beloved Ke$ha music...and Kylie...but Tamster loves me...just not my taste in music...
Even when I realized that I was gonna have to keep doing it for the rest of my life so I can keep this body I paid so dearly for...
hell yes...
I am in love...with the Keiser bike...
It is literally the only mechanical device I have ever been in love with...
(Oh yeah I know just where some of your minds went after reading that comment and I'm pleading the 5th and saying "keep guessing"...hahahahaha)
I'll rephrase...it is the only mechanical device I will CLAIM and publicly declare that I am in love with...
well that and my rabbit...
No, not THAT rabbit...my rabbit wine opener that Twirler Girl gave me. THAT rabbit...WINE rabbit. So I can quickly and efficiently get into a bottle of wine with a minimum of effort.
I love the bike and the wine rabbit...
Oh and maybe I should at my Clarisonic Mia and my Clarisonic Opal and my SonicCare toothbrush...
Just call me a polygamist...I have more than one love...
So back to me and the bike...and get your minds back there too because I can tell some of you are still wandering and wondering (rabbit? what rabbit?...the WINE one...for WINE).
So yes, spin class was awesome and it was sooooo fun getting to see my friends I have missed...
One friend said "you just THINK this is your class"...
I answered him with "No Honey...I KNOW this is my class!"...well it is Je T'aime Jamies class but if she's the queen I wanna be the princess.
My friend the ever-gorgeous MarvelousMonica said "you probably have been listening too music these past 6 weeks" and I told her that yes indeed me and the iTunes have been buddies and that I had handed Je T'aime Jamie a cd full of new fun stuff . (And chica if you are reading this...it has Fall Out Boy's new song on it...just for you!)
I'm gonna spin on Saturday and Sunday and then on Tuesday I get to have the whole box of chocolates because JayVee teaches on Tuesday and there are only 2 things I am certain of:
1) I might die
and
2) If I don't die I will have a helluva ride and burn 600 calories
and then I will WANT to die...or kill her...but I can't because I love her and her class too much...and besides I need someone to drink beer with while her husband the hunk cooks us things we.should.not.eat.
(Don't even get me started on what we consumed during the Super Bowl...evil terrible awful things that should not be spoken of...things...with...bacon...)
I can't wait...for her class...not more things with bacon...we need no more of that...
and I am mentally preparing for it like I mentally prepared for the all-day Keiser training in December or when I took the spin instructor certification class.
If you had told me 4 years ago that I would be EXCITED about a spin class and that I would actually be almost despondent that I could't work out for 6 weeks I would have told you that you needed your head examined...or asked what drugs you were taking because I too wanted to live in FantasyLand.
And besides, I am still working off the consumption of evil and terrible things during the Super Bowl so I need a whole lotta cardio to make up for:
margaritas
bacon cheeseburgers
cheese stuffed jalepenos wrapped in bacon (see I said there was bacon)
queso with taco meat
BS dip (I call it "man crap"...cream cheese, sausage, and rotel...you don't want to know this)
7 layer dip
mushrooms stuffed with cream cheese and sausage
flan (made by an angel but it is the devil)
raspberry white chocolate bundt cake (from Nothing but Bundt...something else you don't want to know about)
Fritos
corn chip scoops
all consumed in about a 6 hour period...
I heard that the calorie consumption of most people during super bowl sunday is second only to Thanksgiving...I think this year I topped it...
So yeah, I had a lot to make up for. And watching Beyonce did not help me any...damn she looked great. Maybe if I had gotten up and done the Single Ladies dance I would have lost a few...micro ounces...
I need to backtrack a little...and tell you about my doctor's appointment and body pump...which I should have started with but I was so excited about spinning I sorta lost myself...plus this blog is never planned it is all just train of thought as the words vomit out of me onto the keyboard.
And by the way I am writing this stone cold sober in the middle of the afternoon so we cannot blame cabernet or any form of pain killers for how insane this all must be...
So I went to see the amazing Dr. Baldwin on Wednesday...she is so pleased with my progress (as am I but I'm not a doctor) and she said I could work out...with restrictions...
Um...can I get on a spin bike?
Yes...
Then nothing else matters...
I can also do weights class. There are a lot of restrictions there:
no chest work
no pec work (same thing...I guess...Dimples?)
no heavy lifting up and over my head (so squats are done with free weights)
no flies of any sort
no pushups (ok that one I sorta am super happy about...sorry Dimples...he's so glad he's not here for this!)
The jury is still out on whether or not I can do the rowers and return to my beloved Shock Wave class.
I told her (Dr. Baldwin) I felt like I should walk around in a t-shirt that says "Body by Baldwin" on it because I feel so good.
When I was at Whole Foods last week (stop me if I have told you this story) I heard a voice behind me call my name...I turned around to see a friend I haven't seen in about 2 months. She told me she had heard that I had surgery and asked about it. She was blown away...so much so she asked for Dr. Baldwin's name and number. As I am telling her the name and she is writing it down this random woman comes wheeling by with her cart and says "are you talking about Dr. Baldwin? I just left her office from a tummy tuck consult!"
My friend and I busted out laughing...friend says "show her the pics" and I did...
I'm pretty sure she called the office and booked the surgery...
We all agreed Dr. B is the bomb...
So after she looked me over and pronounced me ready for the gym I told her "good because I am going to to go body pump tonight".
She was so not surprised...
I think she only would have been surprised if I had told her "I will do next week"...and I think she was shocked I didn't turn up in my gym clothes...but I had a nail appointment after so the gym did have to wait...
The other great news (besides getting to work out and healing well) is that:
I DON'T HAVE TO WEAR THE HORRIBLE DREADED SQUEEZE-ME-TO-DEATH SUPER HARD TO GET IN AND OUT OF AND A REAL PAIN WHEN NEEDING TO PEE COMPRESSION GARMENT...
Although she did suggest i might want to wear it at night so...since I totally sleep alone (unless you count the cats) and I'm not trying to impress anyone...I will...
So I went to Body Pump last night and sweet thing CuteCasey taught and since he knows what I had done we discussed what I could and could not do. Thank goodness for JayVee because she called me Wednesday afternoon to help me figure out what I could lift and do.
So I put tiny little "girl" weight on my bar (1/2 of what I normally do) for warm-up and said a prayer and lifted...
It.Felt.Great.
For lunges I just held free weights in my hands or on my shoulders (since it's not good for me to pick up a heavy bar and lift it up and over my head just yet...even with Casey's help) and the free weights kept me from going too heavy.
2 "tracks" down and I wasn't dead yet...
Next was chest...
break time!
I checked my email and felt sorry for everyone else...no one wants to lift weights for 5 minutes to "Welcome to the Jungle" (and sadly not the original) or do pushups so I was sorta happy for my doctor ordered ban on it...
Next was the back track.
I went light...really too light...
But here's what was great...
There are all these "pulls" you do to the chest or belly and in the past my belly got in my way.
No more...
No more..
Go me!
(or rather go Dr. Baldwin and all the flesh she removed)
The "clean and press" moves didn't feel great but didn't hurt either...
Then we moved on to triceps...
hmmmm....
I went light on the bar and was fine down on the bench doing the little presses...
Trouble came knocking at my door when I tried to do a tricep dip off the bench.
Houston we have a problem...
Felt like my implants were going to explode...
So no dips for a while...
I modified with lifting a plate over my head in tricep extensions...that didn't hurt (my chest...but i felt it in my arms).
Then we had biceps and shoulders and I got through those just fine...
And then core...
Hmmmmm....
as I got down on the mat I wondered what a crunch was going to feel like...
a crunch feels like...
not so fun...
But do-able.
With modifications...it will be a while before I am back to reverse curls etc...but a regular crunch feels just fine.
And then came the moment I cried...
plank
In the past when I planked I would look in my mirror and see the loose skin hanging down like a hammock under me.
Gross.
Super Gross.
I hated it...huge motivation for doing the tummy tuck.
I wasn't even sure I could DO a plank...
But I did...
and as I looked in the mirror...
nothing
flat....
no hammock
I wiped away a tear and said a prayer of gratitude for my surgeon...my ability to do the surgery...that I was healthy enough to do the surgery...that I could pay for the surgery...that I had family and friends to help and support me with my surgery...
And I thought :
HELL YES
And then I made the same vow I have made many times a day since I got the surgery:
I will never ever ever be the fat unhappy girl again...I will work to keep this body I am so happy with...
Well, there are still some flaws but right now I am pretty happy...
So my sweet friend KuteKimmie took this photo of me after class...she suggested it and I almost didn't let her but she was right...I needed to mark the occasion. Most of you have seen it on FB:
So there I am with my very light weight but I am happy happy happy as you can see.
By the way, isn't the top the bomb? I found a new website for workout clothes:
www.zobha.com
priced like Lucy and Lululemon but you won't see 8 other girls at the gym in the same top ;)
So now I am a pretty happy girl...even though my quads are screaming as I sit here at my desk...
So I will use my favorite combination "cure"...wine and Advil (but later...much later) and I'll be fine.
So as I finish this blog I'm thinking:
"you sure talk alot about yourself and seem to think the whole world cares what you lifted or did...where's the good message in that?"
And no, I don't think anyone comes here to read this for anything other than entertainment but I do feel like I should share SOME wisdom or something...after all I am the mother of a philosophy major (this week...yeah Ke$ha Barbie seems to think someone might want to hear her thoughts on things...no, not really...no one wants to hear anything she says...) and because I am southern and we LOVE to spout wisdom whether it is good or not..
Well, what is the message here?
I.Got.Nothing.
Or maybe I do...
Shop at Zobha...
no...seriously...no I mean it...shop there...
but seriously back to what any of you can take away from this (besides having wasted 10 minutes of your time reading this?)...
Ok...I got it:
You won't get a man who drives a big ass truck unless you go to the gym!
No, that's not it either (but it may be true)
BE GRATEFUL
There you go...be grateful...
for what you have
and what you can do
and what you hope to do
Because if this girl, who once weighed over 300 pounds, can cry with joy that she got back to the gym and can say that doing spin class was the bomb...well, anyone can too...
I may not be able to keep up with the pace or the tension the instructor says to use but I will get back there again...
I may not be able to lift the weight I used to but I will be able to again some day...
I may not be able to do pushups (Dimples is now rolling on the floor grateful that he no longer has me to deal with on this one) but I will again some day...maybe....
I may not be able to do all the core work I was able to 7 weeks ago but I will be able to...
And for all of that...and for all of you...
I am grateful!
Thank you for taking this journey with me...I still have a long way to go but it is so much better with someone in the passenger seat to keep me company...
Thank you for all your kind words and well wishes...
Thank you for all the support...
Thank you for reading this stuff I spout out...
Thank you for helping me...
Get ready...the road is long and I need navigators and someone to pump the gas...
Inspiration Song: "Catch my Breath" by Kelly Clarkson...awesome...because surgery allowed me to sit back and catch my breath...and today I didn't have to work as hard to do it as I expected...
Bye Darlings...Catch your breath too...and be grateful...and thank you
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